The Source Of Loneliness
have some of the same symptoms but choose not to
act or deal with these to change the quality of their
life. Many lonely people are just stuck – and why?
Because they choose to remain stuck and not change
In the end, if you are lonely and are unwilling to move
in a new direction to eliminate these feelings or
emotions this is your choice and not caused by the
actions, behavior or decisions of others.
The Benefits of Loneliness
You might wonder why I would even include this
section feeling that there are no benefits to this
emotional condition but I choose to differ and why?
Well, for starters if you are experiencing a sense of
loneliness this can give you an opportunity to reflect
on its causes, reasons and consequences giving you
the option of remaining in this condition or making
the decision to change or do something about it
and since this is a choice only you can make you
have to ask yourself – do I want to remain here in
this situation or is it time do finally do something
During a few bouts with loneliness during my life I
realized I had a choice – change something or just
continue this victim mentality, which by the way I
didn’t like or believe I deserved, but in the end, I was
lonely simply because that was the choice I made, oh
maybe not consciously, but in the end, I had to look in
After consideration, contemplation, prayer, self-evaluation
and some guidance from a few mentors, I
finally realized that life with this mindset lacked any
value and whether or not to change course was in
If You Are Lonely, What Can You Do
I could give you dozens of actions but here are a few
simple ones that I would suggest you consider.
● Expose yourself to new people, situations
● Let go of judgmental mindsets.
● Stop blaming life or others for your condition
● Start a hobby or new activity – take dance
lessons, join a book club, get involved with your
church, volunteer for something – anything.
● Be willing to be honest with yourself about the
whys of your loneliness.
● Take a trip, cruise or just take a walk in the park
several times a week or year.
● Start a good stuff jar (ask me about this one).
● Create a – my blessings list.
● Focus on what you have not what you have lost or
● Make some new friends or even acquaintances.
● Try something new (and you don’t have to start
jumping out of airplanes).
● Get a part time job serving the public (library,
a book store, Hospice, server in a restaurant or
anything that helps you connect with others).
● Laugh more, read more, and keep learning –
● Come on – get busy – doing something
● Turn off the TV and put your iPhone in the closet.
● And please - end the pity party.
In summary, I’ll leave you with a simple question – do
you want to continue the rest of your life, however
much time you have left, in this current state or do
you want to change something? Create your own
action list of things you will start, stop or change.
Tim Connor is a global speaker,
trainer and bestselling author (over
80 books). During his career, Tim has
helped millions of people and hundreds
of organizations around the world
improve their sales, management and
leadership effectiveness, employee
performance and life success.
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